Nearing the end of my Spring 2022 study abroad experience in Toledo, Spain, I had been plagued with the feeling of doom at the thought of returning home. I fell deeply in love with Spain and truly transformed by having to deal with the transition of starting over in a new country, learning the Spanish language entirely, figuring out how to maneuver public transportation and having constant access to public transportation, and adopting a new lifestyle that included siestas. Being an out of state student at Clemson University from Atlanta, Georgia seemed like the biggest adjustment, but adjusting to Spain was way easier than I expected and I knew that in returning home I wouldn’t instantly feel at home. I would no longer be speaking Spanish as frequently with others, I would no longer be able to see the friends I made while in Europe for a long time, and ultimately would feel similar to a prisoner who has to reintegrate into a society they have lost contact with for so long. It was fascinating to me to anticipate culture shock upon returning to my native country and city. My biggest fear of returning back to the States was losing my fluency as I would be away from the immersion and constant need to only speak Spanish and also I extremely feared boredom. In Spain, my Mondays through Thursdays were occupied with classes, my internship, and studying. My Fridays through Sundays were occupied by taking trips, going out, trying new restaurants, and making friends everyday. I knew coming back home, I would no longer have so many opportunities to fill my days with the same spontaneity and constant excitement that I experienced while studying abroad or have the same independence I was allotted abroad.  

 

Prior to my study abroad, I always romanticized Europe; especially Spain. I wasn’t sure what to expect and really had no expectations and all I hoped for was to excel in my classes, improve my fluency, make friends, travel, and not take this opportunity for granted. My first goal of the semester was to do excellent in all my classes and I definitely achieved this goal, but it was not easy. Every class was taught in Spanish and that was a drastic change from my classes in Clemson where the professors will speak Spanish for only parts of the class. The first month of courses at the Fundacion de Ortega-Gasset were rough for me with me having a hard time understanding Spain Spanish. Although it was a struggle, I realized interacting more with native speakers and other people my age helped improve my comprehension. Before Spain, I always idolized the typical American dream of getting married, having that lavish house, successful career, children and settling in one spot for the rest of my life; Studying abroad completely changed that. I now have a deep hunger to explore so much of the world. I feel as Americans we sometimes live in a bubble or in a facade that things are so good in America, when it is not entirely true. I had to go to the doctor a few times due to some serious illnesses and everytime I went to the reception, I expected to have a copay. When the receptionist only asked for my insurance card and no other form of payment, I couldn’t believe it. Not only that, but the access to healthcare in Spain was exceptional where you could see a specialist the same day instead of having to book another appointment and hoping to be seen within a few weeks or months. The States treat healthcare as a privilege, but it should be a right. Access to medical insurance should be a right and I bet if Pharma wasn’t focused on being a business, many more lives could be saved. 

 

Ways in which single stories I had of my host country changed was not expecting Spain to be as much of a melting pot as the United States. I don’t know why it was such a shock to me, but it seems Spain has more immigrants than natives. It is not that I assumed Spain would only be inhabited by Spainairds, but I was shocked to meet so many nationalities in one place. Strategies I implemented to interrupt these stories abroad was to remember I too can be perceived as a single story. People I met didn’t assume I was American until they heard me speak and heard an English accent while I spoke Spanish. Many assume I am an African immigrant, which I am by ethnicity, but not by nationality. I am in the same boat, so I had to put myself in their shoes and instead of assuming, simply listen and learn. I made an effort to challenge single story narratives upon returning home by promoting cultural competence and educating those I encounter. The only true way to combat it is by leading by example and not succumbing to the stereotypes and narratives that perpetuate. 

 

This study abroad experience has taught me so much about others, life, and myself. I am most proud of accomplishing every goal I set for myself without needing validation from anyone else. I regained power within myself and especially to protect myself from those around who sought to control every facet of my life; from my life after graduation, and where or when I decided to settle down. I am proud of myself for finding myself again and remembering the woman I want to be. Spain truly saved my life and helped me find what it is that I truly want in life and that is to live, serve, and experience. My career aspirations have changed from choosing a path of Neonatology to teaching infants/toddlers at Big Blue Marble Academy or being a Medical Receptionist back home in Atlanta where I will still be able to speak Spanish on a daily basis. I still plan to return to Spain in time to teach English as an Auxiliary conversational assistant in Madrid. Studying abroad was the first time in a long time that I had felt so happy and so full so I’m lucky to be able to cherish this experience and feelings forever. Spain was exactly what I needed, I cannot wait to return to my home, Spain.